Respect, Compassion, Sensitivity
Building a Bridge: How the Catholic Church and the LGBT Community Can Enter into a Relationship of Respect, Compassion and Sensitivity by James Martin, SJ, has sparked diverse and passionate reactions within the Catholic community and beyond, especially among those of us in the field of LGBTQ+ affirming therapy. As a therapist dedicated to full inclusion of all people, the book's approach to dialogue between the Catholic Church and LGBTQ+ individuals is reflective of the pastoral tensions many clients and practitioners confront daily.
Martin’s book centers on three essential principles: respect, compassion, and sensitivity. He invites institutional church leaders and LGBTQ+ Catholics to meet one another with these attitudes, creating a much-needed model for empathetic engagement. For many LGBTQ+ clients, spiritual trauma and exclusion are all too familiar in faith contexts. By focusing on listening and validation, this book honors lived experiences without imposing rigid narratives, which is essential for healing.
Therapeutically, this book’s encouragement to share stories and foster understanding is powerful. Narrative therapy highlights how telling one’s story can foster agency, reduce shame, and promote healing especially when these stories have historically been silenced. Martin’s emphasis on building bridges (rather than walls) echoes the affirmative approach to counseling, centering clients’ dignity and worth.
The meditations Martin offers on key scriptural passages can also act as helpful spiritual resources for clients seeking to reconcile their faith with their sexuality or gender identity. Such meditations may serve as anchors during moments of rejection and despair, further supporting psychological and spiritual wellbeing.
Despite its strengths, Building a Bridge is not without its frustrations for those of us seeking a more robust affirmation of queer people. While it asks both LGBTQ+ Catholics and Church authorities to move toward each other, some compromises suggested like accepting the Church teaching on homosexuality as sin demands significant self-sacrifice from LGBTQ+ parishioners, perpetuating an unequal burden of reconciliation. For those already dedicated to full affirmation, the book’s tone may seem too gentle in that it doesn’t challenge harmful doctrines directly.
As a therapist, walking alongside LGBTQ+ clients who have experienced spiritual exclusion means recognizing both the hope this book can offer and the painful limitations of its approach. A bridge is just a starting point. Affirmation, reconciliation and justice require more than polite dialogue. They require active commitment to the full inclusion and flourishing of LGBTQ+ people in all areas of life, including the faith communities many call home.
Building a Bridge offers an imperfect, but meaningful, step forward. For my clients, its invitation to mutual respect and the sharing of stories can help alleviate isolation and foster hope. At the same time, we must remain vigilant, supporting those for whom mediation isn’t enough and pushing for deeper transformation in both church and society.
